One Bad Egg, One Beautiful Girl
Seven years ago today, in a hangover stupor, I stumbled toward the bathroom and peed on a stick. It wasn't that I thought I was pregnant. It wasn't that I wanted to be pregnant. It was just that after years of negociating with Mike on whether or not we'd have children, I had "won" the arguement and he'd stopped using condoms. Just as the birth control went out the window, I had second thoughts and decided we needed to wait a few more years. Yet still didn't use any alternative methods of birth control. Unsure then of my pregnancy status, I figured I'd better test as my lifestyle of drinking and smoking and smoking and drinking would all but guarantee my birthing a brain damaged drooler.
As the second line turned a bright pink almost immediately after my urine hit the stick, I stupidly thought, "This isn't right. I'm just so dehydrated from all that booze last night that my pee is concentrated. I'll guzzle a gallon of water and retest in an hour." Somewhere deep down, though, I must have known it was true as I stubbed out the cigarette I was smoking and didn't pick up another one for almost a year.
A few hours and numerous pee sticks later, I woke Mike up with the original stick and "So what are you doing December 10th?" He, of course, thought I was pulling an April Fool's Day prank. It wasn't until he sat up, looked closely at the stick and at my silly grin that he accepted it.
Now that baby I was just starting to grow that April Fool's Day seven years ago sleeps upstairs, on the top bunk with a Harry Potter book tucked under her pillow that she thinks I didn't know she hid there. She's missing a tooth, bottom left, her first baby tooth to check out and make way for the teeth that will see her through to her death. She's fighting yet another cold, running a fever, and waking up to read her book and drink water every 20 minutes or so. Unlike her parents, she's a skinny little thing with a passion for money and self promotion. Like her daddy she's a fiery red head with curls and legs that like to run. Like her mama she's a hard-to-read, moody bitch. But Reilly Kate is nothing if not original. Lord, that child is orginal.
In January, we went to a Madeleine Albright book signing. Madeleine Albright had given the key note address at Mike's master's graduation ceremony way back in the day. We had brought a picture of him shaking her hand to have her sign. When it was finally our turn, Reilly Kate marched straight up and asked, "Do you remember Daddy?"
Being the woman that she is, Secretary Albright said, "Of course I do!" All her handlers as well as the other patrons laughed which Reilly Kate didn't appreciate at all.
She then proceeded to inform Secretary Albright that she was planning to become "President of the United States... for two terms!" Big plans, she has. High aspirations. I just hope she takes Madeleine Albright's advice and works hard, studies hard. Reilly Kate's the type who thinks it all should just come to her because... well, because she's Reilly Kate afterall.
She is the center of our family. Hell, she's the center of this blog. As Mike has always said, "You'd have nothing to write about without her blog fodder." And so I wouldn't.
No April Fool's prank here today. Just a mama's thoughts on her little girl on the anniversary of the day she found out she was to be her mama.
As the second line turned a bright pink almost immediately after my urine hit the stick, I stupidly thought, "This isn't right. I'm just so dehydrated from all that booze last night that my pee is concentrated. I'll guzzle a gallon of water and retest in an hour." Somewhere deep down, though, I must have known it was true as I stubbed out the cigarette I was smoking and didn't pick up another one for almost a year.
A few hours and numerous pee sticks later, I woke Mike up with the original stick and "So what are you doing December 10th?" He, of course, thought I was pulling an April Fool's Day prank. It wasn't until he sat up, looked closely at the stick and at my silly grin that he accepted it.
Now that baby I was just starting to grow that April Fool's Day seven years ago sleeps upstairs, on the top bunk with a Harry Potter book tucked under her pillow that she thinks I didn't know she hid there. She's missing a tooth, bottom left, her first baby tooth to check out and make way for the teeth that will see her through to her death. She's fighting yet another cold, running a fever, and waking up to read her book and drink water every 20 minutes or so. Unlike her parents, she's a skinny little thing with a passion for money and self promotion. Like her daddy she's a fiery red head with curls and legs that like to run. Like her mama she's a hard-to-read, moody bitch. But Reilly Kate is nothing if not original. Lord, that child is orginal.
In January, we went to a Madeleine Albright book signing. Madeleine Albright had given the key note address at Mike's master's graduation ceremony way back in the day. We had brought a picture of him shaking her hand to have her sign. When it was finally our turn, Reilly Kate marched straight up and asked, "Do you remember Daddy?"
Being the woman that she is, Secretary Albright said, "Of course I do!" All her handlers as well as the other patrons laughed which Reilly Kate didn't appreciate at all.
She then proceeded to inform Secretary Albright that she was planning to become "President of the United States... for two terms!" Big plans, she has. High aspirations. I just hope she takes Madeleine Albright's advice and works hard, studies hard. Reilly Kate's the type who thinks it all should just come to her because... well, because she's Reilly Kate afterall.
She is the center of our family. Hell, she's the center of this blog. As Mike has always said, "You'd have nothing to write about without her blog fodder." And so I wouldn't.
No April Fool's prank here today. Just a mama's thoughts on her little girl on the anniversary of the day she found out she was to be her mama.
posted by The Histrionics of a Fat Housewife at 9:08 PM
2 Comments:
too funny.. I was in labor on April fools day with Dylan 14 years ago.... so strange how these things work in 7 around us huh? I held him in past midnight for fear that he would be born on "fools day" and be teased his entire life.. then I made it the 2nd and wanted to go for the 3rd because the 3rd is my grandfathers birthday.. but alas, my son popped his head into the world at 6am and was held there until the dr made it at 7am and was born at 7:03am. The 2nd works way better anyway for me because his birthday is exactly 6 months to the day of my birthday Oct 2nd.
awwww. She sounds awesome.
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